Monday, April 20, 2009

69 Things to do in Wal-Mart !!!!!!?

* Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.


* Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.


* Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.


* Start playing football -- see how many people you can get to join in.


* Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and yell, %26#039;%26#039;I need some tampons!!%26#039;%26#039;


* Try on bras over top of your clothes.


* Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms.


* While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible %26#039;%26#039;Sex and Candy%26#039;%26#039;


* Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, %26#039;%26#039;I think we%26#039;ve got a Code 3 in Housewares,%26#039;%26#039; and see what happens.


* Tune all the radios to a polka station, then turn them all off and turn the volumes to %26#039;%26#039;10.%26#039;%26#039;


* Play with the automatic doors.


* Walk up to complete strangers and say, %26#039;%26#039;Hi! I haven%26#039;t seen you in so long!...%26#039;%26#039; etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.


* While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, %26#039;%26#039;Who BUYS this ****, anyway?%26#039;%26#039;


* Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.


* Put pairs of women%26#039;s panties on your head and walk around the store casually.


* Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins.


*. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.


* As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, %26#039;%26#039;Wow. Magic!%26#039;%26#039;


* Put M%26amp;M%26#039;s on layaway.


* Move %26#039;%26#039;Caution: Wet Floor%26#039;%26#039; signs to carpeted areas.


* Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you%26#039;ll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.


* Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.


* Nonchalantly %26#039;%26#039;test%26#039;%26#039; the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.


* Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,%26#039;%26#039;...I%26#039;m Batman. Come, Robin -- to the Batcave!%26quot;


* TP as much of the store as possible.


* Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.


* Play with the calculators so that they all spell %26#039;%26#039;hello%26#039;%26#039; upside down. (01134)


* When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, %26#039;%26#039;Why won%26#039;t you people just leave me alone?%26quot;


* When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, %26#039;%26#039;Red Rover!%26#039;%26#039;


* Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.


* Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.


* Take bets on the battle described above.


* Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. Barbie. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect...)


* While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.


* While no one%26#039;s watching, quickly switch the men%26#039;s and women%26#039;s signs on the doors of the restrooms.


* Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from %26#039;%26#039;Mission: Impossible.%26#039;


* Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.


* Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.


* Fill an entire cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone%26#039;s jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.


* Set up a %26#039;%26#039;Valet Parking%26#039;%26#039; sign in front of the store.


* Two words: %26#039;%26#039;Marco Polo.%26#039;


* Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.


* %26#039;%26#039;Re-alphabetize%26#039;%26#039; the CDs in Electronics.


* In the auto department, practice your %26#039;%26#039;Madonna%26#039;%26#039; look with various funnels. * Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like %26#039;%26#039;the fat man walks alone,%26#039;%26#039; and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.


* While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying %26#039;%26#039;How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won.%26#039;%26#039; Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.


* When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, %26#039;%26#039;No, no! It%26#039;s those voices again!%26#039;%26#039;


* Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.


* Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax.If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don%26#039;t get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.


* Get a stuffed animal, go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying %26#039;%26#039;Good girl, good Bessie.%26quot;


* Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putting one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.


* When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.


* Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.


* Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.


* Test the fishing rods and see what you can %26#039;%26#039;catch%26#039;%26#039; from the other aisles.


* In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with a girl and start flirting with him as ditisily as possible: %26#039;%26#039;Hi! (giggle) What%26#039;s your sign? (giggle).%26#039;%26#039; When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. %26#039;%26#039;Hi! (giggle) What%26#039;s your sign? (giggle).%26#039;%26#039;


* Hold indoor shopping cart races.


* Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.


* When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially through narrow aisles. * Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.


* Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. * Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.


* Say things like, %26#039;%26#039;Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?%26#039;%26#039;


* Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., %26#039;%26#039;Do you have any Shnerples here?%26#039;%26#039;


* Ride a display bicycle through the store -- claim you%26#039;re taking it for a %26#039;%26#039;test drive.%26#039;%26#039;


* Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.


* Get boxes of condoms and randomly slip them into peoples%26#039; carts when they aren%26#039;t paying attention.

69 Things to do in Wal-Mart !!!!!!?
Another annoyingly good one and thanks again, you are good!
Reply:sounds like somebody loves to play at the stores.way 2 go! Report It

Reply:hehe try pouring tomato soup to the bathroom Report It

Reply:Sounds like someone has a little problem. Report It

Reply:Sounds like any shopping trip with both my kids. There are so many things that sound familiar!
Reply:got sidetracked what was that again?with a little more ooomph this time...
Reply:See, the problem with you people is that you disrupt the whole store by doing these things. Wal-Mart employees have to go behind you and clean up all your messes. And, when you go to the cosmetic department and use all the lipstick and contamenate everything...well, no one else can buy it. And you wonder why we are out of the product that you want.You don%26#039;t care though. Once, you actually have to work there, because you get laid off from you real job you%26#039;ll understand. Not to mention that it wouldn%26#039;t take long before you will get kicked out of the store. Most of the stuff on the list you could even go to jail for. I%26#039;m a Wal-Mart associate, and I don%26#039;t think this is funny at all. I have to go behind idoits that come threw my department and clean up everything. I don%26#039;t have time to do that, because I usually have a million other things to be doing. Wal-Mart employees are not your parents, and you should have some respect when you come in to the store. Just because your bored and have nothing else to do you come to Wal-Mart and make more work for us. Get a life. Grow up. Go find something to do with your time that uses some kind of thinking. When your at home do you make messes and not clean them up? I would hope not, otherwise it be pretty gross at your house. I%26#039;m sorry if you live in a pig pen, but don%26#039;t make all of the Wal-Mart employees and customers walk around in your filth. I hear customers complaining all the time about how gross the stores are and its because of you that%26#039;s its like that. Thanks for coming out and making people understand that us employees try to take care of your messes, but there are just to many of you and not enough of us. I don%26#039;t expect my 10 points, but thanks for this...got out some frustration.
Reply:Funny, I have to admit, but what was the question? lol
Reply:I%26#039;m losted. (No Joke)
Reply:wtf?
Reply:I couldn%26#039;t last that long in wal-mart
Reply:lol
Reply:lol ive heard that befor! i think it is totally funny! im not sure if u had this one but here it is:


while in the caffeteria, ask for a drink and explain that u dont get out very offten, then when they hand u ur drink say, %26quot;o could i get an umbrella in this?%26quot;


lol i like that one because it isnt mean to other ppl (like taking their carts) and it would b funny to c what happens!
Reply:OMG, that was some FUNNY stuff, I especially liked the yelling Code 3 part and the one about setting up a chair in front of the magazine section :)
Reply:wow
Reply:Why would you take so much time to type this? Find a hobby already.



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